The Internet is full of ridiculousness, obviously. But sometimes you come across something that gives ridiculous a new meaning.
A web service called Information Age Prayer uses computerized voices to say daily prayers for paying subscribers. From the website: “Are you forgetful? Subscribe and the computer will never forget to voice your prayers each day. Choose a religion [from the menu] on the left to see available prayers.”
Most prayers that the service offers cost $3.95 a month and include one prayer recited each day by their computer. “The Complete Rosary Package” will cost you extra though, only $49.95 a month. A year’s subscription: $549.45 (last month free!).
Seriously? Seriously.
By now you must have some questions. Here a few lovely tidbits from their FAQ section:
Are the prayers meaningless, will subscribing really make a difference?
As with all prayer, the final results are up to God as everything follows His will. We make no claims regarding the efficacy of the service… The omniscient God knows exactly who has subscribed and who each prayer is from when their name is displayed on screen and their prayer voiced.Are prayers blasphemous when voiced by a computer?
We recommend you contact your local clergy for a personal answer, however we think that Information Age Prayer is a new and exciting way to connect with God.Is it wrong to charge for prayers?
The fees assure our customers that we are the most reliable service provider for Information Age Prayer.How are prices decided?
Prices are determined by the length of the prayer. A discounted prayer will cost less than other prayers of similar length.
Damn, I would hate to get a “discounted prayer”.
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No thanks, I will just hang out my prayer flag. Uses less electricity.